HarassedMoms thoughts on racism

I have taken a while to write this post because it is not a topic you just bang out a post about but it is something I feel I need to write about.

As a nation, South Africa has started the year on a rather negative note. Some very hateful things have been said, from both sides of the fence and some rather ugly discussions have happened online. It has also sparked some very positive and constructive discussions and those of us who are prepared to admit we were wrong or that we can still learn, have learnt a lot.

It has made me very aware of how and what we are teaching our children, specifically in relation to race.

I think it is too simple to say “kids don’t see colour” because they do. Jack knows Cameron is a different colour to him, he asks us about it. Kiara’s classmates know I am a different colour to her, they call me out about it. Cameron was very aware he was the only child of colour when he joined his swimming club. They see it, they notice and they question it. So we have to do more than simple assume the children growing up in South Africa today will not be racists because they don’t see colour. It is naive.

It is something we have to actively teach them and it is really something that can only be taught through action.

Just think for a minute about what your behaviour must be like for you to raise a racist;

You must be disrespectful of people based purely on the colour of their skin,

You must act superior to everyone not from your race,

You must openly and blatantly discriminate against people based purely on the colour of their skin,

You must talk down to people of colour.

(to name a few things)

Now read that list again and ask yourself if that really is who you want to be and more importantly who you want your children to be?

Teaching your child tolerance and acceptance is not rocket science, it is not hard, there is no secret, it is simply teaching your children to treat every single person they meet with the same level of respect and kindness.

It is greeting the cashiers, talking to the lady packing your bag, engaging with the car guards, respecting doctors and nurses.

It is not assuming every Afrikaans person knows how to farm.

It is not speaking to a person of colour in some strange accent.

It is not assuming the homeless man at the robot is illiterate or uneducated.

It is not calling the white kid with his R2000 brand name shoes and a spoilt white kid.

It is calling people out who say inappropriate things or treat people without respect.

It is not accepting the “but that’s how I was raised” debate.

Your child learns what you teach them. Make sure what you are teaching them is something you will be proud of.