Meet SA mom blogger Anastasiya! She shares with us her parenting struggles and joys and reveals that when she opens her heart in a post, that’s when people respond.
1) What do you normally get up to on an average day? (Give us a brief description about yourself)
My day starts at five am each morning. It’s pretty much a rush of getting two kids ready, getting my husband ready and lastly myself. On most mornings, my make-up is done in the car.
I work as a content and copy writer in a shared services regime, so my day is filled with research, creating content, drafting and editing, and trying not to mix up my companies with the work at hand.
When my day shift ends at the office, I start my night shift immediately. When I’ve picked my kids up from school its goodbye to any thoughts I had on peace. I have a three year old who doesn’t rely on sugar to make him bounce off the walls. My five month old is busy as well, but at least he is stationed in one place. I’ve received advice from many moms about spending time with your kids first, and once they are in bed, start on the chores. I didn’t agree with it then and don’t agree with it now. I try to implement the chores during the evening that my oldest can ‘help’ me with while we explain to baby what we’re doing and why. It counts as spending time together as well as getting the job done.
By the time feeding, bathing and sleeping is complete – it’s around eight o’clock. At this stage I look at the remaining dishes to be washed and then I look at my couch. I contemplate which would be more relaxing at this time. Of course the couch would win fair and square, but I need to think of having less chores for the next night as I’ll be in the couch-dishes argument with myself again.
After tiding up as much as my energy allows me, I flop down on the couch, put on my series (How I Met Your Mother), unpack my laptop, notebook, diary and colour pens. This is where I do my blogging; my ideas flowing and my fingers typing. A few hours later I’m awoken by a warm sensation on my lap, with my laptop reminding me to stop lounging around on the couch and get into bed before my hubby complains about the couch being the new napping station.
2) How do you feel about motherhood – what are your struggles and joys?
How do I feel about motherhood? Hmm, it’s a little tough to answer. The answer varies on the type of day my boys are letting me have.
My joys revolve around my kids showing me love and affection. Having the innocence that only kids have, where finances aren’t an issue and worries about where you misplaced your favourite car are the biggest worries of their day. I’m happy when my kids are happy. I’m happy when my kids smile, snuggle against me with their heads buried in my neck and just stay there, wanting to be held close. The reward of parenting, no matter how hard it becomes, is having your child show you that what you’re doing for them, you’re doing well.
My struggles revolve around failures. I worry a lot about the things I do wrong. I worry about how I fail them as a parent. Sometimes I think this worry consumes me so much that I miss the moments where I might realise that I’m actually doing something right. How much judgement we moms go through, be it from other moms or ourselves? We second guess our actions and decisions and it puts strain on your parenting confidence so that you might just be the failure they are talking about.
3) Tell us about your kid(s):
I have two boys; my breath, my lifeline.
The oldest being Chase is 40 months old and is a loving gentle child. Even after a traumatic birth and complications, he never skips a beat with growth and life. Earlier this year, we found out he was being bullied at his previous school by the classmates and moved him to safe environment. Seeing my child, an extrovert, turn into an introvert almost over a weeks’ time was heart-breaking. He stopped speaking and regressed to babbling, he stopped eating with a fork and spoon and started using his hands again. It felt like I was looking at my son but seeing a completely different person standing in front of me.
His new school has been a blessing. Over a couple of weeks he started peeping out of the shell to explore the new world surrounding him. Seven months down the road, he’s smiling and laughing constantly. He’s singing and sharing his toys with us again (he had to build up trust with almost everyone he knew). He’s improving his communication skills and isn’t as keen on using his hands when eating anymore.
We had a little bit of trouble with him understanding that our attention would now be shared between him and his brother. Today, he can’t wait to cuddle with his brother in the mornings when he wakes up and is very protective over him. You can see the pride he wears on his face that he is an older brother.
Ehren was born in June and recently turned five months. Although I had a quick and easy birth experience with him, I had severe postnatal depression to deal with. I cried so many nights because I was alone with both kids most of the time and I was cracking up. It took me about a month to sort my emotions out, and Chase wasn’t helping with the situation because he wasn’t getting all my attention anymore. Ehren is a little bigger than standard for his age and he has just started on solids. His latest mission is to sit on his own, which he doing well propped up with a few pillows and sitting upright until his back gets tired.
I must say, I have two determined fighters, when they set their mind to something, there’s no changing it until they achieved their goals.
4). How did you start blogging?
I started writing poetry while I was passing through a dark time in my life. This is where I realised that the only way I could release any emotions was by writing about them. A few years after I completed school, I gave up on my ambitions to write and decided to settle for mediocre and boredom. In 2013, I came across someone’s blog who had the same childhood story as I did and it gave me a purpose again to live the way I wanted to – by writing again. Thus Annimation Flow was created and today, slowly but surely more people are responding to my thoughts on the pages and relating to stories that I share about my life as a woman, a mother and a wife.
5) Share with us a valuable blogging tip you’ve learnt (or more):
I have tried writing on a few topics on my blog. Anything from health and beauty, parenting, to movie reviews to just writing about anything because I was experiencing bloggers block.
Over a few weeks (recently) I just blogged about parenting, my life with kids and my ups and downs in life. These posts attracted more readers and I received more feedback than ever before. It made me realise; these posts are from the heart. These posts are unique because they tell my story. These posts are important because the words are real to me and to my audience.
The lesson I’m taking from this is that writing pieces that are confident and true (because they are close to your heart) is my way to break into exposure on the net. Talking about my experiences and how I’m dealing with situations in my life is my letter to the world saying – this is who I am, this is how I live.
Firstly I would just like to congratulate Anastasiya!!! She is such an amazing and inspiring person. I have known her personally for almost a year and I must be honest and say she is one he’ll of a Women!She is such an incredible mother to 2 adorable boys and always puts them first. She has a way of creating a smile in ones day without her even noticing it. Such a beautiful read Anastasiya xoxo